Arthur Baer
Nickname: Bugs
Birthdate: January 9, 1886
Birthplace: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA
Date of Death: May 17, 1969
Occupation: Humorist and Journalist
Profile: Best known for
One Word Led to Another and inventing the
nickname
Sultan of Swat
for
Babe Ruth.
Website: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arthur_Baer#cite_ref-4
Number of Quotes: 26
A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done.
A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
A good neighbor is a fellow who smiles at you over the back fence, but doesn't climb over it.
A movie star is a bit player with a press agent.
A newspaper is a circulating library with high blood pressure.
A plumber is an adventurer who traces leaky pipes to their source.
A yawn is a silent shout.
About a veteran player thrown out trying to steal second: There was larceny in his heart, but his legs were honest.
Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse.
His head was full of larceny, but his feet were honest.
His insomnia was so bad, he couldn't sleep during office hours.
If you do big things they print your face, and if you do little things they print only your thumbs.
If you laid all our laws end to end, there would be no end.
It is impossible to tell where the law stops and justice begins.
It was as helpful as throwing a drowning man both ends of the rope.
It was so quiet, you could hear a pun drop.
Lefty Grove could throw a lamb chop past a wolf.
Liquor – you can make it illegal but you can't make it unpopular.
Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can’t, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it.
[History is] petrified imagination.
She used to diet on any kind of food she could lay her hands on.
She's generous to a fault - if it's her own.
The ladies looked one another over with microscopic carelessness.
There is no such thing as an attention span. People have infinite attention if you are entertaining them.
Last on Earth
